Packing...

Sitting here with my 'infinitely slow' internet connection at home unable to really access ANYBODY's blog's or to really see what's going on in the world. From this telephone, little packets of data are carried over 200 sea miles to the closest 'real' internet connection by tiny little men in blue overall's with Kenya Telkom signs on their backs... At least they are all well built... (I have such a warped imagination!)

Anyhoo, sending this post via Email so hoping it will arrive.

House full of people packing stuff and making sure my good go on a ship next week. Really sad at the moment, but such is life.

Dawie's in the hospital (again) for some further tests so I've made my flight back earlier - need to be by his side. They must just finish this packing thing now.

Hope y'all are really well!

Will catch up when I have decent (read broadband) connection at 'home' in Pretoria.


TTFN

We still have such a long way to go...

Just when you think you can relax a bit, things like this happen... The link is here, but I've copied some of the article below. Honestly people, get over yourselves already!

Banjul - Eccentric Gambian President Yahya Jammeh threatened to behead gays unless they left the country, according to reports on Thursday.
"The Gambia is a country of believers... sinful and immoral practices (such) as homosexuality will not be tolerated in this country," the president told a crowd at a political rally on May 15, said reports.
He went on to say he would "cut off the head" of any gay person caught in The Gambia.
The anti-gay campaign continued in the Gambian pro-government media this week with the Daily Observer publishing a virulent editorial.
"We have said it before and we will say it again. This is a Muslim and Christian country. Both the Qur'an and the Holy Bible condemn homosexuality - pure and simple," the paper wrote on Monday May 19.

I'm at a loss for words.

In just over a week...

My heart is heavy at the moment for a number of reasons. Firstly, I had a really nice dinner with some friends last night - he's a 'Souf Efrikan' and she is a Kenyan indian. They are such lovely people and made me feel so welcome - she even made the food less spicy just for me as I cannot really handle too much chili in my food - like it, but it does not like me too much of late...

This is the kind of kindness and hospitality I'm really going to miss. Not getting invited to dinner or going to a fancy restaurant with friends and acquaintances - no, I'm going to miss the 'local culture' of Karibu Sana - you are welcome. Nothing is ever too much trouble or 'not my job'. In most cases you get greeted with a friendly smile and a warm handshake - real, honest 'honesty'.

In just over a week I'll be getting on a plane for the last time as a resident of Kenya. It will not be the last time I'm in the country - no, I'll be visiting frequently, but it is a sad day to look forward to...

What I won't miss is not being with my hubby though!

Have a pretty day now y'all!

TTFN

Ps: And now EVERYBODY can see which words I cannot spell 'cause spellchecker is highlightin' them all pretty like in yello!

The mountain, the elephant and the very dusty trip.

Had the most amazing weekend at the foot of Mount Kilimanjaro this weekend. Was actually in Amboselli National Park on the Kenyan side of the Mountain, and we stayed at a stunning lodge, Satao Elerai that opened recently. (Now if Blogger or my ISP would only allow me to upload some pictures, I could show y'all how pretty it was there - but nooo, the Internet is out to frustrate the shit out of me today and is achieving it's goals admirably!)

It was a trip that I will not forget for a long time, if ever. Firstly we had the whole planning thing arse about face - got the directions wrong and ended up being lost for over four hours, but a least it was a fun four hours - driving trough a national park at night (illegally I might add) and then 'waiting' for a heard of ellies to cross the road - so worth it! And then getting to the camp with a cold gin and tonic and a warm meal waiting for us - how tough is it living in Africa?

The next day, after a scrumptious breakfast, we did a self drive safari with a Masai as our guide. He command of the English language included left, right, straight, elephant, zebra, warthog etc and nothing else. It was amazing how this man could spot an animal MILES away and I could not find it with binoculars. Muzungu's (White people) aren't made for the bush apparently... We saw a heard of ellies (my favourite animal ever!) of over 100 animals, and the stunning sightings just kept coming. At one stage we were parked on the road with the heard on both sides of us - younger crowd on the left taking a dust bath, older crowd on the right giving disapproving glances.

So the next minute these two young'ens start making a ruckus on the left - chasing each other, kicking up a whole lot of dust and making a real noise. (I'm in heaven at this stage, ellies playing) This goes on for a few minutes and then an old bull from the other side of the road decides that enough is enough... He drops his (not unsubstantial) fifth leg and start storming across the road - trumpeting and making sure EVERYBODY knows he's now PISSED. He storms trough the crowd of other young'ens and heads directly for the two young bulls making a fuss. These two have seen that they are now in trouble and decide that the best course of action would be to RUN... They head of in separate directions and run like hell, but the old 'codger' has set his sights on teaching somebody a lesson - and gets a hold of the one young'ens tail - young'en not slowing down for a second, just being tugged at from behind by angry bull elephant and 'sort of screeching' the whole time in this very nervous little voice. It was the funniest thing ever - even our Masai Guide had this grin on his face for the rest of the afternoon.

So after not being able to really catch this young'en the old bull decided to pee on everything and then went back to standing around and being calm and collected... (By the way, a bull elephant having a pee is a sight to behold!)

Telling you more of this trip will take me a whole day and I just don't have time, but will try and post some video of this event and share it with y'all.

On another note - I only have another week or so left in Kenya before I go back home... Sadness has gripped me, and at the same time happiness as well. And on yet another note - has some really exciting news on the work front as well which I will share soon... Going to have a whole lot of fun I am!!!

Hope y'all are having loving, sharing days now!!!

TTFN

Men, and the wisdom of women...

I have a aunt that lives close to my parents home in
SA. She turned (terrible word, but OK) the ripe old
age of 81 recently and has always been one of those people that you just cannot help but admire.


Aunt C married quite young with a man that was 15 years older than she was. They lived on a farm in the Freestate and were, to be modest, very successful tobacco farmers. Just over ten years ago her husband passed away and she bought the property close to my parents home which she shares with her youngest daughter and her husband.


The reason I say that she is somebody that I truly admire, is that she is such a wonderful role model for somebody of her age. After a few years she decided that it just was not fun to be alone anymore, and decided that she would start dating again! Now, she's been with her 'boyfriend' for about 3 years and he is, once again, a few years older than she is. However, don't for one moment think that these two old 'fogies' sit around drinking tea and playing chess. No dearies, they scoot all over the place on Uncle N's motorbike (!), go for adventure holidays where they hike, dive into pools over waterfalls, take part in classic car rallies in their restored Alfa Romeo Spider, and just get up to all sorts of antics for two 'oldies in their 80's'...


She also has the funniest things to say about men, especially since she knows I bat for the other team and she loves my hubby to pieces, we tend to have these discussions about men and what they are like:


1. 'My dear boy, all men are the same. It's just their surnames that differ...' She said to me one day when the husband and I were having a little disagreement - nothing serious and this comment defused the situation completely.


2. 'Men only have three moods my dear boy. They're either sleepy, horny or hungry. So, if he's not sleeping, and he doesn't have an erection - give him a sandwich!' Never a truer word was spoken...


3. 'My best friend in this world is Viagra. How else would we make Uncle N do what he's supposed to do. For goodness sake my boy, can't keep giving the man sandwiches...'


There are so many more and I wish that I can live the life she leads into my 80's, with the hubby at my side. She is truly an inspiration to me.


Age is after all just a number and you will only feel as old (or young) as you choose to feel!


I'm off to Mount Kili for the weekend, so hope y'all have a really pretty youthful weekend now!


TTFN

Amazing !! Don´t try this at home !!!

This was posted by Wilde Yearnings and I thought I'd put it up as well...

By the way, it's usually a lot worse than this! I love every minute in Africa!

Hope y'all have a pretty day now!

TTFN

Ps: WY thinks that 'Shitty hoppa' drivers are on crack - but if i had to sit in this traffic all day, I would also use A LOT of drugs!

My youth and Kenya now.

Had one of those 'reminisce' evenings last night - nay, I lie, could not sleep so the mind wandered a bit, and my thoughts took a stroll to my youth again. (Seeing as I'm such an old codger at the ripe old age of 38!)

Twenty odd years ago I was an Innocent-ish young man with very little experience of life. I grew up in a typical Afrikaans home where rules were rules and you obeyed them, end of story. My parents (bless them) were WAY more liberal and progressive than most. Yes, I grew up as a privileged little boy with parents that encouraged us to think and to 'debate' the situation in our lives, but we were also very 'guarded' as to the 'big bad world out there'! This is not a bad thing - my parents protected us as any parent would, and we somehow managed to survive despite our guarded upbringing. But to get back to twenty years ago when I left my parents home.

My first experience out in the real world, all on my own that is, was when we went on our 'Matric Holiday' with a few friends. Matric is what your last year of High School is called in SA - or Grade 12 as it is called now. Then you're supposed to go off to further education - but in my case it was a case of going to do my National Service - Conscription was still very active in those days. That is a story that I've told before - just follow the link, so not going to get into that again. What I do remember so well thought from this time in my life was my awakening sexuality.

Here I was in a time when it was still very much taboo to be anything but a total 'skirt chaser' and I was on holiday with my group of male friends - all of whom where 'obviously' as straight as they come. (No pun intended - well maybe just a little...) Eight boys travelling trough what was then known as the Eastern Transvaal (Now Mpumalanga), hiking nature trials, skinny dipping under waterfalls, sunbathing on the rocks afterwards. It was such an innocent time... (Ja right, I hear you saying...)

At this stage of my life I was sexually active already - his name was C and he and I had been at it for quite some time already, but we both thought this was just a 'phase' and that we would still get married (to women darlings - try and focus!), have children/breed and live the 'normal' life. We were unaware that gay people actually existed - had normal lives and that this feeling that we had for each other was actually that L word. Now, thinking back, we had no real frame of reference at all - TV had no gay characters, it was not something that was discussed by anybody, and it was a very closeted society we lived in. (Which makes the new South Africa all that more special!)

What I'm getting at is that young gay men and women of today probably have it a lot better than I did in my time - in a open minded society, that is. Kenya reminds me of my youth to an extent when we had to live our lives under covers and behind closed doors. My wish for this country is that people will come to realize that Gay people are not evil, vile terrible creatures that intend on stealing their husbands (well, unless they're cute - KIDDING!) and calling the fashion police on them. (Maybe in certain cases it could be justified.) Maybe one day all people can live their lives as they choose and not be victimised for being themselves.

Just a thought...

Hope y'all have a pretty day now,

TTFN

Graham Norton - Part 1

'I don't have much time' today, so gonna post a few videos of one of my favourite gay personalities...

Graham Norton Xmas Special - Part 2

One does enjoy Graham Norton quite a bit... And I also want one of those 'coffee stirers'.

Packing lists, moving dates, KRA and other 'madening' exercises...

'Pay Ceasar what is due to Ceasar' - says the bible, and in principle, I agree. After all, if nobody paid their taxes as they should, the goverment would not be able to do the job it is assigned. OK, there are certain things wrong with the way things are going after the 'general erection' of December here in Kenya - like the fact that a top heavy (never mind bloody expensive) pairlement is in place, but in principal, I have always believed that paying your dues to the goverment is part of the responsibilty of a good citizen/resident of a country. And I've been diligent in making sure that my 'contribution' (however meager it may be) goes to the state coffers every month.

Now, however, as I'm about to choose items to go into a container and have these memories shipped to another country, KRA (Kenya Revenue Authority - a.k.a Satan's spawn) is requiring me to complete a plethora of little forms and letters. Submit costs of items - how the hell should I remember. I don't keep receipts and most of the items were bought on the streets where receipts are not really a big priority anyway... But here comes the crunch!

If you think KRA is anal - try and deal with SARS (South African Revenue Services - a.k.a the devil incarnate). These people have the intilectual capacity of dead crayfish - no wait, that's an overstatement - of dead cacti, pond scum, nail varnish removal liquid, an ink blotch... Whatever really! For crying out loud - how the hell am I to 'repatriate' my meager earthly possesions without acutally following them into the country? (The first question is - Are you also entering the country with your goods?) I shake my head in utter disbelief. Wake up folks!

On a lighter note... Headin' here this weekend ->
Should be fun - just below Mount Kilimanjaro and time spent with a dear, dear friend of mine. At least then I can forget about the KRA's and SARS's of this world for a little bit...



Hope y'all have a really pretty day now!




TTFN

Dumb Laws - So Graham Norton

This is sooooo funni!

Poor Melba - was not in front of the que when brains were being dished out!

Have a nice weekend now!

Planning a move and other useless info...

As you might know, I'm being transferred back to SA from the beginning of July, so now we have to plan to take a few earthly possessions and obviously my clothing and personals down with me. It's not that I have anything specific of great value, but I do have quite a few things of great significance... It might mean nothing to somebody else, but to me these are memories that I need take with me, and place in our home in Pretoria lest I ever forget this phenomenal time of my life spent in paradise a.k.a Kenya.

So the process begins. Getting quotes from a number of relocation companies, deciding what is important and what I can actually just get rid of or (more likely) donate to some worthy charity. And this is where I'm surprising myself - yes, I actually gave a little yelp of utter surprise when I realized this. When I had to sit down and really decide what is important and not just a nice to have, it became apparent that I've changed in this time that I've spent in Kenya. You see, before pretty things were quite important to me - good brand names. Yes, I was a style queen... But now it seems with age comes wisdom (or stupidity, not quite sure which it is.). It is no longer the big and fancy or shiny item that must absolutely be crated up and packed on a container, but the small little items that have some sentimental value. The silly little wire boda-boda curio that I bought from a street vendor in Kampala, the framed carving acquired in Dar-es-Salaam once, the stack of kikoy's bought all over the country, the wind-chimes of little tin fish I found in Kisumu, the lopsided glass bowl my staff gave me for Christmas last year... Nothing of real value, but completely irreplaceable items nonetheless.

Nice... So, I have a whole house load of stuff that needs to be disposed of. Except for my books - that's getting packed first! Any ideas...

Hope y'all have a nice weekend now!

TTFN

Happy Gay day y'all!

Well, today is (unofficially!) Gay Day in South Africa. It comes (no pun intended) from the date - the 8Th of May. When said in Afrikaans it's pronounced 'Ag Mei' which is a silly connection, but a connection nonetheless...

So, go on - hug a straight person today. Or, if you feel like it, give their tight little tushie a little pinch!

Whatever blows your hair back!

TTFN

Travelling in Kenya.

Just read a 'rather funny' post, and it reminded me of a time (it was last Easter, actually) when we travelled down to Kilifi for a long weekend. A dear friend from SA - her nickname for me is Chicken so that's what we'll call her here, was here for a visit, and a local friend Es was also travelling with us. Dawie was flying in from Joburg and taking a connecting flight to Mombasa where we would meet him and then proceed on to Kilifi. The picture is of the house we rented.

But I digress...

Chicken is a 'Kugel' of note. This is 'Souf Efriken-ism' for 'Cool Girl', or a person (of the female persuasion usually, but you do get male kugels) that is a dedicated follower of fashion, talks with a funny-ish nasal, accent (Ye knew doll, this little spot is deviiiiiiine!Im about to platz!) and is ever so slightly over the top. Do not misunderstand me for one second - I love her to pieces, she is such a genuine person and will not hurt a fly, but her mannerisms really are very stereotypical. It is also important to note here that Chicken is VERY well travelled and has been all over the world - both on leisure and business travel. However, most of her travels are to Europe and the like...

So we set of for Mombasa with a cooler box full of Evian water, wet wipes to clean our hands and faces every now and again, some low -GI sandwiches in a cooler and a half a ton of luggage. We also have the air con pumping full blast in the car, and soft, esoteric music playing on the stereo. It's all very Zen...

As you might know, the first section between Nairobi and Machakos Crossing is not particularly smooth, and this took us a good hour and a bit to complete. Chicken is making little funny noises in between mouthfuls of Evian, and me overtaking into oncoming traffic and the occasional crazy driving antics as only displayed here in Kenya. Ducking a diving in between cars and matatus, taking on trucks and just generally being a right arse on the road - loving every minute of it... Chicken - being of the nervous passenger variety, makes comments like -'You never told me we needed a sports bra for this daaaahling', and 'My Gawd, this is stuuuuning doll!' and 'Mummy needs to make piddles, see!'... So, after a rather bouncy bit we stopped at Machakos Crossing at the fuel station to 'make piddles'.

This specific station is used by the truckers that travel on this very busy route and, to be honest, is not particularly 'clean and sanitized'. In fact, as you get out the car, you get a whiff of old urine and blocked toilets, and then you're not even close to the bathroom door yet. You have to still walk around the building... So, Es and Chicken head for the bathroom (I know better, I'll stop next to the road a little out of town) and I sit in the car. Chicken has a packet of wet wipes, a toilet roll and hand lotion in her hands in addition to the whole handbag thing, and Es - being an old Kenyan traveller, a roll of paper and wet wipes.

Chicken, bless her, walked to the bathroom with all her normal flair, flicking her hair, slight bounce in the step and bosom pushed out to as far as it would go - getting the attention they deserve - the puppies, I mean, her Prada heels clicking on the rough sidewalk next to the petrol station. She walked to the door of the bathroom, slight grin on her face and took one step into the door of the bathroom. As if running into a brick wall she stopped, paused for the slightest of moments and duly made a 180 degree turn. Walking back to the car, she looked me straight in the eye and said 'Don't worry sweetie, I'll hold it!'

And she did - until we stopped another two hours later - but she was applying Avroy Slain to her lips every few minutes and not a drop (wet or dry) passed her lips until she had a chance to empty her bladder. I have enormous respect for her - I cannot hold 'it' that long - when a mans gotta go, a mans gotta go!

The rest of our trip was wonderful and the rest of the weekend phenomenal, but that is another post altogether - or maybe I've written about it already... Not about to go back and check. There were other great instances - like when Chicken went to braid her hair in Kilifi, when she was 'attacked by a vicious minkey' in the room, when we had to remove the 'froggie from the bathroom but not kill it, because it has a family' or when we used a tuk-tuk to go to town and it nearly rolled over when negotiating one of the pot-holed streets. (That scream made the whole town of Kilifi stop in it's tracks for a few seconds...)

Dawie and I both LOVE Chicken to pieces and one of the places where we can always just be ourselves is at her stunning home in Sandton. (Obviously!) She is just such a sweet, wonderful and sincere friend. The rare kind!

Now hope y'all have a really purdy day now, see!

TTFN

Spot the difference...

This is a picture of where I'm living at the moment...

City of Nairobi.







































And this is where we live in Pretoria...











Can anybody spot the difference?

Thanks to Google Earth for the pictures provided.











Will tell you more about my wonderful weekend at Lake Baringo tomorrow, now there is just not enough time!

Hope y'all had a good weekend.

TTFN

Lake Baringo...

Spent some time this weekend at the stunning 'Camp Island' as we called it, or Island Camp as it is really known... Was a bit of Freudian Slip the first time it was said and it stuck around for the rest of the weekend. Well, long weekend really, we arrived on Thursday and only got back to the city on Sunday afternoon. It was truly worth every shilling... You have no choice but to relax and just let the time fly by - you're on an island in the middle of a croc invested lake, so what you gonna do - swim across?

The first pic is where we are crossing the equator by road...

I'll post a few pictures here today - no real time to write a whole story with it, but it will come!

On the boat on the way to the Island. It was a stunningly hot dry day!

Sunrise the next morning over the lake - taken from the veranda of my tent on the edge of the water. Boy, life is Africa is hell! Hell I tell you!

Sunset over the lake. Taken from 'skull island' as we referred to it. The island in your sight is where we stayed. Went for a sundowner cruise to another island...

Skull island taken from the restaurant side.

Just for interest sake, the owner of the lodge on the island is a lovely fellow that is quite the host - he's always got a quick joke and time to talk to his guests. He is also, very gay friendly for those gay folks looking for a spot to travel to that does not 'frown' upon two men sharing a double bed. (Not that my Dawie was there, but I discussed this with him...)

I'm out to my friends and they in turn outed me to him - not that I'm worried about that - he seemed very friendly. Even made a joke when we were checking out that he should post his lodge in the Pink Pages as 'Camp Island' and he (in a very serious note) told me about Gay tourism in other parts of the world, and how much we (the rainbow folks) could mean to a business - as if I don't know, but it was very sweet...

Some more pictures!

Am I the only one to see the 'phallic image' with this Eclair... Maybe I've just been away from the hubby for too long!

More sunset pic's.

Quite the unique picture taken by a friend. And a bit of a pun for the local brew, of which we consumed copious amounts. It was REALLY REALLY HOT, alright!

That all for now folks. Hope y'all have a really pretty day now!

TTFN