Dawie...

My darling husband passed away on Christmas eve. At this moment I just feel pain and sorrow, and I have no words, but the most important thing is that he's no longer in pain...

Dawie, I will love you forever...

Seasons greetings.

To all my friends in Cyberspace I hope you have a blessed Christmas spent with the people you love and hold dear, and that it will be a peaceful time for all.

I'm off work as of today and will be fetching Dawie from the hospital this afternoon. He will be spending as much time as we can at home - depending on his condition, but the plan is to make this a very special Christmas for him. I decorated the house this weekend with lights and put up the Christmas tree in the lounge - thanks to my dear sisters and their husbands who helped me. So, this evening when he gets home it's going to look a lot like Christmas...

So - to all and their loved ones : Keep them near and cherish them, for one never knows what tomorrow brings.

B.

Stuff.

It's been a while since I've posted anything here a whole month in fact... I've had a lot to think about and a lot to consider, and frankly, I'm still not sure that I need to write it down here - but I need an outlet...



My poor darling husband is terminal. There, I've said it and it's killing me. The doctors have confirmed that there is not a hell of a lot more that can be done to help him except to make him as comfortable as possible. We've made the decision that it's no longer important for him to work - he's taken an extended leave of absence from his work and basically is claiming disabilty. He's very weak at the moment and on constant pain meds, but his still able to function relatively well - can go to the bathroom, clean up after himself etc. Whe've already organized with a private company for a day and night nurse to help me when he's no longer able to do 'his thing' on his own. I have to keep working for now but will also take extended leave when nessesary - it is difficult though, just started a new job...

That bit I wrote and never posted - as of today, he's in hospital and receiving treatment. I've taken as much leave a I can but need to finish a few things before I can leave and spend all my time with him. Not a very festive season in our house this year...

The worst part of this whole thing is seeing the man I love - the person who has made every living moment of my life worthwhile, melt away to nothing. His body has given up but his mind is still strong. I still get the biggest grin possible when I walk into the hospital room. He still sends me little text messages when I'm not with him to tell me how much I mean to him. I don't want to break down in front of him but this is the single hardest thing I've ever had to do and all I want to do is cry. How unfair is this - he's only 39 years young. Our friends and family are so supportive but it all feels so damn hollow. Why?

I'm absolutely broken...

Obama and Kenya.

I just spoke to a few of my dear friends in Kenya, and the feeling there is ecstatic - they've even declared tomorrow a public holiday - I kid you not! But let's be realistic for one minute and think if this makes any real difference to the country where President Obama (Boy, that sounds good!) father comes from.

The US has an economic situation that is dismal to say the least. This needs real attention and this will (or at least should) be his first focus. In the process he might make it better for emerging or third world markets, but this will not be his main focus - and rightly so. He has to ensure the well being of the people that put him in office after all!

The situation in the Middle East will surely take up an enormous amount of his time. It needs to be resolved, and soon as well - but he cannot just pull the troops and expect things to get better on it's own. It would need to be well planned and very well executed.

What I can say is that we are all part of a little piece of history that will, I'm sure, go down as a landmark in the history books. I'm sure that this will make a difference to minorities in the US if he keeps his campaign promises, and will eventually filter down to the rest of the world.

To all my readers from the US - I cannot think that one of you supported the Bush Puppet man so good for you! I hope this brings the change you have voted for!

Good Luck Mister President!

TTFN

Ps: Just 'found' this picture on the web - is that a gay flag in the background? My my, but it seems Mr. Obama has a profound influence after all...

Unpacking my life.

I think this is the last of it - we've unpacked the last box of stuff (finally) and can now just live in the new home. The one thing that shook me a bit is exactly how many bottles of 'perfume' we have. My goodness - look at it! We can start a store - and some are duplicates too! My favourite is still Farenheit by Cristian Dior thought...

I've always (well, for as long as I could start buying my own) 'worn' 'perfume' on a daily basis - not overpowering - that's just 'common', but just enough for a hint of freshness to my day. And, I've always believed that you should invest in good quality as they keep their fragrance better and last the whole day - and there's less chance of smelling like a cheap prostitute!

Basically, I've taken a few pictures of the completed 'home' and will post them after some editing.

Hope y'all are having a blast of a day!

TTFN

New week - last week...

It's been such a crazy time of late - I know I know I've said that already, but it just seems like my life is running away from itself... I will try and sort out my time better once I start at the new job next week!

Yes, I've been head hunted by an affiliate company in the group I work for and I'll start with them from the beginning of November. Should be a challenge and a new exciting prospect - very young crowd and young 'vibe' at that group, so going to have some fun. I think I'm truly blessed that in the VERY insecure economic times that I still get to grow my career (and income) - this in spite of the the fact that EVERYBODY is cutting back staff. So, this is my last week in the company I'm in at the moment and I still have a few things to complete and hand over.

We've just gone trough another series of tests with Dawie and it's mostly good - his liver function was a little shaky but that is being treated now. He's gained a total of nearly 10kg since June and he's starting to look like a human being again - less stick insect like. He still needs to gain at least 10 kilos to be back where he was, but we're getting there. I, on the other hand, need to lose some of these 'love pounds' I've gained since my return to SA. You see - I try and cook food that will help hubby gain the weight, but it also means that I gain the weight! Not so good for a person that is prone to obesity - and I quit smoking, so it's a bit of a double whammy! Oh well, it's half an hour on the stepper three times a week for me.... Hate that bloody stepper - climbing stairs to nowhere!

Have made a mental note that I should really try and 'get to' my blog more often and also try and read my 'blog reads' more often as it feels like a bit of a void in my life at the moment. Now to make the time for that...

Hope y'all are well, and hope that my US readers have 'fun' during their last few days of campaigning before your general 'erection'.

Go Barack Obama!

TTFN

TGIF!

It's been one of those weeks where Hell would have spat me out for my mood! Bless Dawie for putting up with me sometimes... I've been in a foul mood all week and have no reason other than real stress and workload. I know, it's pathetic, but hey - even this wonderful man is only human! (SNICKER!) So, this weekend I'll make up for it by treating the husband to a little bit of pampering.

Tonight we'll go to his favourite seafood restaurant for some prawns, and we'll lie in tomorrow morning while I make us breakfast in bed - eggs benedict is one of our favourites and it's not too difficult to make. (Mental note to self - stop at Woolies Foods on the way home for ingredients.) And then on Sunday it's lunch with my family - so that should be fun as well. No wonder I look like the Goodyear Blimp at the moment - just turn me on my side and trow a few lights on me and you would not be able to tell the difference!

Anyhoo, after 'writing' a whole load of hoohie - here's wishin' y'all a lovely and fun filled weekend!

TTFN

A whole month...

It's been an entire 30 days since I've last posted anything here... Boy, time flies when you're damn busy - not that I'm looking for excuses, I'm just really really busy at the moment. It always seems like, as we go towards the end of the year, life just gets more and more hectic and crazy. And every year it just seems a little bit more crazy than the year before. Maybe my age is.... No, that's not it - I'm just looking for excuses. So, what's been happening in our lives?

Summer had hit with all it's might and our daily temp is hitting the mid - thirty's (about 90 Plus Fahrenheit) again. Thank the Good Lord for AC in cars, houses and offices. We also thought that it's time for the kids to get their 'Summer Cut' and this is how they looked just after they returned from the parlour - those little bows in their hair lasts about 32 seconds before the play removes them. That pink thing lying in front of Jess is her favourite toy - a pink pig made of sheep's wool and stuffed with a 'squeaky' - she's on her second one this year already, and Dawie keeps hiding it away!

We spent a lovely weekend away in the Pilgrims Rest area - an old Gold mining town that is now a national monument/tourist trap. This was one of the first places Dawie and I visited together years ago and, even tough the place has become very commercial, we still love visiting there and just dawdling from shop to shop. And it's only 350km (about 220 Miles) one way from home, so an easy weekend drive - 3 hours.

Then this weekend we went to Bela Bela (The Tswana name for Hot Springs or Boiling Boiling) for our annual family fest that was held there. This is when the whole family gets together for a weekend once a year and just talks, eats, plays games, eats, talks, eats and catches up with each others lives. Oh, did I mention that we eat a LOT! Very typical 'Souf Efriken' tradition is to show your 'love' for someone by feeding them, and since Dawie is still in recovery and still very thin my entire family all watched his every move around meal times. (And he's not a very big eater at the best of times...) We were around 150 odd people there this year - Lot's of fun!

I'll post some pictures next time and I promise that it won't be a whole month again...

Hope y'all are well!

TTFN

Some feedback...

So, the 'big bad church' lost it's case against the evil gay man. Big up's for the South African legal system! I especially like the fact that this is a watershed moment is South African law as anybody can now take an employer to task for discrimination based on sexual orientation! Good. Still planning to go and paint their fence in pride colours...

On another note, decided on a phone. It will be a Nokia E71 so that I can still receive my mails on my mobile but at least it's less of a brick to carry around. Now just hope I don't drop it in the first week. The IT guys said I should get a little thing called a condom for it... Apparently it's a rubber 'jacket' that you pull over the phone to protect it. Well then, that's exactly the same as the condoms we keep in our bedroom drawers now, isn't it? Don't think it will work the same way though...

This weekend they are launching Mamma Mia here. (Yes, yes. SA is a bit behind the rest of the world in some things) On Saturday we're going to get dressed up in white spandex suits and going out to see the ABBA movie. I'll look like the Goodyear blimp in drag but hey, anything for a laugh, right? Should be fun though... And no - no camera's allowed!

Then we're also busy with the garden layout at the moment. Will post some pictures of that when it's done. The house is 'nearly' finished, but I'm sure Dawie will start changing things soon enough. He's never been one to keep things the same for very long.

Hope y'all have a really pretty weekend now and be good, or at least good at it...

TTFN

Choosing a new toy...

Trying to choose a new phone at the moment as mine had an 'untimely' death when it accidentally fell out of my hand at the mall this weekend. It is/was a Nokia 6680 which, frankly, gave me great service. Also have an iMate Qwerty which I use for work but that is a whole chapter on it's own - my advice to anybody - NEVER get an iMate phone! About as user friendly as a wounded buffalo! (For those of you who are not in Africa, that means pretty unfriendly...)

Back to my Ex-Nokia. Great phone, shitty memory but in general easy to use and tough, so can handle my 'rough ways' with mobile phones. This is the phone I've used the longest (just over two years) of all my previous ones as most of my cellulars seem to give up the ghost pretty early on in their lives. So, here I sit in front of my screen with a list of (I kid you not!) 508 phones that I can choose from on my contract... What the... How in the name of all things holy should one decide which phone is better that the next, which one will stay in fashion for longer that a mere nanosecond and which one will have a decent battery life based on a pretty picture with people running trough a field of daisies with Dalmatians playing in the background. Honestly - what does it have to do with the whole thing? Call me old fashioned - when did a phone become a camera/PDA/Video Machine/Vibrator/Sex slave etc etc...

So, here I go surfing the Internet and findin' myself a new phone. What fun! (NOT!)

Hope y'all are having a pretty day now,

TTFN

A little comment...

Besides the Olympics and South Africa's dismal performance being headline news right now, there is another story that is getting some attention at the moment. One of the really conservative Afrikaans Churches is being sued for wrongful dismissal by an ex employee for not only being gay, but (heaven forbid!) being in a long term relationship with a man! And now their leader said that they 'could have helped him' if he only confessed that he was a 'homosexual' person - HOW? You conceited bastard...

Lucky for him he lives in a country where his right of freedom of choice with regards to his sexual orientation is protected by the constitution and the outcome of this case will probably be that the church would have to pay up. This is discrimination, pure and simple.

This specific church is not too far from our home in Pretoria. It's a big, pompous glass and brick monstrosity on a large tract of land surrounded by miles of palisade fencing. I'm of the opinion that we should get together a team of people and go and paint their 'cherished' palisade fencing in the PRIDE colours one evening... That should keep them busy with the 'moffie' (gay) agenda for a while. Bastards...

Now I feel better - had my little rant for the morning. On a personal note, feeling more alive and well after the flu thing, Dawie is getting stronger by the day. Jessica (our Yorkie) went into 'that time' and it's quite the effort keeping her away from all the male visitors to our home at the moment - little slut! (Daddy's little slut! Dawie says she's just as randy as I am...) Jason (our male Yorkie) was 'fixed' a while ago, so he's no real threat, although he does try his luck with her. Don't want to 'make' grandchildren just yet, so we need to skip this time around.

Otherwise, just work and carrying on with life. We're planning a trip to Crystal Springs next month, and then we're also planning a trip to Cape Town for Dawie's 40th early next year... Goodness - we're older than the crypt keeper... That trip should be fun! And then still planning our trip to the US of A for late next year. Have to have dreams daaaaaahlings!

So, that's my life in a nutshell - I know I've been really quite of late, but it's been such a mad time. I need to visit all my 'bloggin' friends to see what's up in their lives and play catch-up a bit...

Hope y'all are as well as a pig in pooo!

TTFN

Under the weather...

Today I would need a little contraption like the one in the pic... The Rivers of Babylon (great song by a long forgotten band) are runnin' trough my 'dhose' and I'm feeling very sorry for myself... Typical male, no?

So, it's of to work and making sure that the nessesary is done, and then back to bed for me today. Will spend the day watching BBC Food (My favourite channel, btw) and just sipping on the Chicken Soup my dear hubby cooked for me - bless him!

So while I'm lounging around and feeling miserable, I'll make the nessesary changes to my blog that are so long overdue with the new (very fancy) broadband internet connection at our home - wireless 'nogal' I might add! The whole house is a WIFI spot! How cool is that!

Hope y'all have a really pretty day now!

TTFN

A whole half a month extra!

Yes, that's right.... Seems I've added an entire 15 days to my life so far. What will I do with all the spare time I'll have one day?

Maybe I could climb Kilimanyaro, or Kayak down the niver Nile... Or, I could just sit around and enjoy my newfound health (and WEALTH!) by being an official non - smoker....

Your Quit Date is: Tuesday, April 15, 2008 at 12:00:00 AM
Test Time Smoke-Free: 98 days, 12 hours, 2 minutes and 42 seconds
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 1970
Lifetime Saved: 15 days, 1 hour
Money Saved: S343.00

Now, hope y'all are having a really pretty day!

TTFN

Ps: Dawie is getting better by the day. He's picked up a whole 5 kilo's in the last two weeks and he's a lot stronger - physically and mentally. Thanks for all the good wishes etc.

Happy birthday Pappa (Daddy) Madiba.

Here's my little wish to the one single person that makes me truly proud to be 'Souf Efriken'.

'Happy 90th Madiba. In my eyes you will always be a true leader, statesman and symbol of peace.'

I hope y'all have a really BLESSED day!

TTFN

Time for a change...

So, it's been a few weeks of turmoil and drama in my life, but now it's time for a change! Yes, it's time to 'get my life back' so to speak. Dawie is getting better by the day and will be returning to work next week (albeit for only a few hours and only three days a week, but still), I'm busy with 4 different projects at the same time (try keeping that in the air!) and the container has (finally!) arrived and we can now conclude the move to SA. So, with that in mind, it's time I change my blog to reflect my 'new life'...

We need a new name. Now, I've asked this before, but I would really love some suggestions... I started this not so much as a blog but as a diary of my experiences, but now it's turned into something that I enjoy and want to contnue doin'. Hey who knew I had a little bit of creative juice flowin' trough me...

Then I would need to start 'adjusting' this to suit my new 'space' as it's not really about a strange country anymore. Yes. I'll still be travelling a lot (Going to Brazil next month) but I'm now based in my 'home town' so to speak. Oh well, can still write about my experiences, right?

Well, expect a new face and a new outlook in this little blog! Welcome to my new world!

TTFN

Ps: Will be busy with unpacking till next week, so hope y'all have a pretty weekend now!

I can honestly say that I'm suffering from 'blog-lessness' at the moment. I don't have the time to read all the folks that I read, and I don't have the time to post on my own space either... 'Tres' frustrating I might add! My life at the moment is crazy busy and it feels as if I have no real control over it.

It's up at 5 in the morning to make sure hubby has breakfast before he needs to take his first batch of tablets, then feed the dogs and make sure everything is set up for for the hubby for the day - he's still at home and still quite weak so I need to make sure that he is comfortable and has everything within easy reach before I leave for work. I might add here that I'm SO not a morning person, so this is VERY tough. Then it's getting myself ready and in the car for a two hour commute to Jozie and a full day of work ahead. Rush back home - another two hour commute, and then it's making sure dinner is ready and the evening tab's go down. Then some quality time with the children and the hubby before I collapse into bed at about 12... And work is MAYOR stress at the moment too. I'm busy with a restructuring of operations and obviously not very popular, but it's par for the course.

Sound like it's crazy and it is, but I'm really thankful that I can be here while my man recovers and gets stronger again, and I'm thankful that I can afford to appoint a housekeeper that can keep an eye on him during the day. I'm thankful that his boss has told him to take as long as he needs to recover and that his job is safe, and that they are not cutting into his earnings at all even though he's used all his sick leave due to him! Amazing! And I'm thankful for a Mom that drives to him every second day to 'check on my son'. Bless her big time!

So, long story short - I'm busy! Hope y'all are having a really pretty time now...

TTFN

A very frustrating week...

It's been one of those weeks were you wish that EVERYBODY would just piss off and go and flush themselves down the toilet. The stress at work is getting crazy - too much to do with too little time and a very sick hubby at home that needs attention all the time, stress at home getting a little too much - very sick hubby that is frustrated because I tend to be overprotective and then he gets frustrated with me, and all of this with a three hour commute every day due to the loving government that are working on every single access route into Johannesburg for the 2010 soccer world cup... At least by 2010 traffic will be a breeze - mostly 'cause everybody's dead due to road rage! (Not to mention the price of fuel!)

At least from next week I can work mostly from home as there are fewer meetings to attend and less 'in office' tasks to complete. And my PA will be more comfortable with her job description so she will not need me to be there all the time - poor thing only started this week. (Apparently I'm mean and very bombastic! Not really, just very demanding...) God bless the inventors of the Internet/broadband and telephones!

Long story short - looking forward to a weekend of doing as little as possible. Spending time indoors with my man, and just pottering around the house.

Hope y'all have a loverly weekend as well!

TTFN

An update part two.

Firstly, to everyone that has sent me notes, text messages (guys, remember the time differences OK!), phone calls etc etc - thanks a stack! Y'all are really wonderful people.

It's been a few days of up's and down's but mostly up's. Hubby is a lot better (he's starting with his fussy ways again...) and we are home - our domestic worker has offered to stay over the weekend (even thought it was a long weekend in SA) to help me and to make sure that I also get some rest. The meds etc are quite demanding and meals have to be served at certain times and with certain ingredients. Something we've never done before, so this is quite the adjustment. We used to be very happy go lucky with meals and mostly ate when and if we felt like it. Anyway, at least it a square 6 meals a day now...

On the health front - he's breathing better and sleeping better because of that. The surgery scars are still very painful but the stitches are out and the specialist says it's looking good. He's picked up another 3 kilos (and I've picked up a kilo as well - eating in sympathy!). All in all, its still not nearly easy, but it's getting better every day.

As for work - the new post is great but very demanding - but the bosses understand that my priorities lie somewhere else at the moment. They've cancelled all my travel arrangements until the end of July in order for me to be home for a bit - good guys then. And I get to work from home if I want to, as long as the results stay the same. RESULT!

Hope y'all are well and happy and none of my US friends have been fried to a frazzle in that little heat wave.

Will keep y'all posted.

TTFN

A little update...

It's been about two weeks since I've posted anything on 'me little blog'... Sorry, but it's been a really crazy, crazy couple of weeks here and my priorities have been elsewhere.

Dawie is home and recovering at the moment. He had to undergo a biopsy on his lungs and is still very sore and can't really move to well. The most important thing is that they FINALLY figured out what has caused his severe weight loss and his general 'bad health' - it also does not help that he is quite proud and has not been completely honest with our doc - but that is a different post for another time.

He has a variation of TB - something similar to a birdflu that he most probably got when he was working all over rural KZN. This is causing him mayor weight loss (he truly is as thin as a rake!) and also caused him great difficulty breathing. He also did not have a good reaction to the anastethic and had to spend four days in ICU for post op recovery - I must be honest, in front of him I was very brave, but behind his back I honestly thought I was going to lose him. As I'm typing this, my eyes are filling with tears again - I would not want to live without him - ever...

Anyway, that was last week and as we speak we have moved in with my parents in order for my mom to keep an eye on him during the day while I go to work. (Thank the Good Lord for wonderful parents!) It won't be for too long - maybe until the weekend, because we also need our space. His recovery will be a long and very involved process (About two years according to the specialists), but we can already see an improvement and he's picked up a whole 2 kilo's in a week, so mom is feeding him well!!!!

Not going to go on too long as I'm trying to type this while he takes a nap - I'm just glad he's getting better... Thank you to everybody who has sent me notes of encouragement, love and support - we both appreciate this so much.

I will try and post more regularly to keep y'all updated.

TTFN

Packing...

Sitting here with my 'infinitely slow' internet connection at home unable to really access ANYBODY's blog's or to really see what's going on in the world. From this telephone, little packets of data are carried over 200 sea miles to the closest 'real' internet connection by tiny little men in blue overall's with Kenya Telkom signs on their backs... At least they are all well built... (I have such a warped imagination!)

Anyhoo, sending this post via Email so hoping it will arrive.

House full of people packing stuff and making sure my good go on a ship next week. Really sad at the moment, but such is life.

Dawie's in the hospital (again) for some further tests so I've made my flight back earlier - need to be by his side. They must just finish this packing thing now.

Hope y'all are really well!

Will catch up when I have decent (read broadband) connection at 'home' in Pretoria.


TTFN

We still have such a long way to go...

Just when you think you can relax a bit, things like this happen... The link is here, but I've copied some of the article below. Honestly people, get over yourselves already!

Banjul - Eccentric Gambian President Yahya Jammeh threatened to behead gays unless they left the country, according to reports on Thursday.
"The Gambia is a country of believers... sinful and immoral practices (such) as homosexuality will not be tolerated in this country," the president told a crowd at a political rally on May 15, said reports.
He went on to say he would "cut off the head" of any gay person caught in The Gambia.
The anti-gay campaign continued in the Gambian pro-government media this week with the Daily Observer publishing a virulent editorial.
"We have said it before and we will say it again. This is a Muslim and Christian country. Both the Qur'an and the Holy Bible condemn homosexuality - pure and simple," the paper wrote on Monday May 19.

I'm at a loss for words.

In just over a week...

My heart is heavy at the moment for a number of reasons. Firstly, I had a really nice dinner with some friends last night - he's a 'Souf Efrikan' and she is a Kenyan indian. They are such lovely people and made me feel so welcome - she even made the food less spicy just for me as I cannot really handle too much chili in my food - like it, but it does not like me too much of late...

This is the kind of kindness and hospitality I'm really going to miss. Not getting invited to dinner or going to a fancy restaurant with friends and acquaintances - no, I'm going to miss the 'local culture' of Karibu Sana - you are welcome. Nothing is ever too much trouble or 'not my job'. In most cases you get greeted with a friendly smile and a warm handshake - real, honest 'honesty'.

In just over a week I'll be getting on a plane for the last time as a resident of Kenya. It will not be the last time I'm in the country - no, I'll be visiting frequently, but it is a sad day to look forward to...

What I won't miss is not being with my hubby though!

Have a pretty day now y'all!

TTFN

Ps: And now EVERYBODY can see which words I cannot spell 'cause spellchecker is highlightin' them all pretty like in yello!

The mountain, the elephant and the very dusty trip.

Had the most amazing weekend at the foot of Mount Kilimanjaro this weekend. Was actually in Amboselli National Park on the Kenyan side of the Mountain, and we stayed at a stunning lodge, Satao Elerai that opened recently. (Now if Blogger or my ISP would only allow me to upload some pictures, I could show y'all how pretty it was there - but nooo, the Internet is out to frustrate the shit out of me today and is achieving it's goals admirably!)

It was a trip that I will not forget for a long time, if ever. Firstly we had the whole planning thing arse about face - got the directions wrong and ended up being lost for over four hours, but a least it was a fun four hours - driving trough a national park at night (illegally I might add) and then 'waiting' for a heard of ellies to cross the road - so worth it! And then getting to the camp with a cold gin and tonic and a warm meal waiting for us - how tough is it living in Africa?

The next day, after a scrumptious breakfast, we did a self drive safari with a Masai as our guide. He command of the English language included left, right, straight, elephant, zebra, warthog etc and nothing else. It was amazing how this man could spot an animal MILES away and I could not find it with binoculars. Muzungu's (White people) aren't made for the bush apparently... We saw a heard of ellies (my favourite animal ever!) of over 100 animals, and the stunning sightings just kept coming. At one stage we were parked on the road with the heard on both sides of us - younger crowd on the left taking a dust bath, older crowd on the right giving disapproving glances.

So the next minute these two young'ens start making a ruckus on the left - chasing each other, kicking up a whole lot of dust and making a real noise. (I'm in heaven at this stage, ellies playing) This goes on for a few minutes and then an old bull from the other side of the road decides that enough is enough... He drops his (not unsubstantial) fifth leg and start storming across the road - trumpeting and making sure EVERYBODY knows he's now PISSED. He storms trough the crowd of other young'ens and heads directly for the two young bulls making a fuss. These two have seen that they are now in trouble and decide that the best course of action would be to RUN... They head of in separate directions and run like hell, but the old 'codger' has set his sights on teaching somebody a lesson - and gets a hold of the one young'ens tail - young'en not slowing down for a second, just being tugged at from behind by angry bull elephant and 'sort of screeching' the whole time in this very nervous little voice. It was the funniest thing ever - even our Masai Guide had this grin on his face for the rest of the afternoon.

So after not being able to really catch this young'en the old bull decided to pee on everything and then went back to standing around and being calm and collected... (By the way, a bull elephant having a pee is a sight to behold!)

Telling you more of this trip will take me a whole day and I just don't have time, but will try and post some video of this event and share it with y'all.

On another note - I only have another week or so left in Kenya before I go back home... Sadness has gripped me, and at the same time happiness as well. And on yet another note - has some really exciting news on the work front as well which I will share soon... Going to have a whole lot of fun I am!!!

Hope y'all are having loving, sharing days now!!!

TTFN

Men, and the wisdom of women...

I have a aunt that lives close to my parents home in
SA. She turned (terrible word, but OK) the ripe old
age of 81 recently and has always been one of those people that you just cannot help but admire.


Aunt C married quite young with a man that was 15 years older than she was. They lived on a farm in the Freestate and were, to be modest, very successful tobacco farmers. Just over ten years ago her husband passed away and she bought the property close to my parents home which she shares with her youngest daughter and her husband.


The reason I say that she is somebody that I truly admire, is that she is such a wonderful role model for somebody of her age. After a few years she decided that it just was not fun to be alone anymore, and decided that she would start dating again! Now, she's been with her 'boyfriend' for about 3 years and he is, once again, a few years older than she is. However, don't for one moment think that these two old 'fogies' sit around drinking tea and playing chess. No dearies, they scoot all over the place on Uncle N's motorbike (!), go for adventure holidays where they hike, dive into pools over waterfalls, take part in classic car rallies in their restored Alfa Romeo Spider, and just get up to all sorts of antics for two 'oldies in their 80's'...


She also has the funniest things to say about men, especially since she knows I bat for the other team and she loves my hubby to pieces, we tend to have these discussions about men and what they are like:


1. 'My dear boy, all men are the same. It's just their surnames that differ...' She said to me one day when the husband and I were having a little disagreement - nothing serious and this comment defused the situation completely.


2. 'Men only have three moods my dear boy. They're either sleepy, horny or hungry. So, if he's not sleeping, and he doesn't have an erection - give him a sandwich!' Never a truer word was spoken...


3. 'My best friend in this world is Viagra. How else would we make Uncle N do what he's supposed to do. For goodness sake my boy, can't keep giving the man sandwiches...'


There are so many more and I wish that I can live the life she leads into my 80's, with the hubby at my side. She is truly an inspiration to me.


Age is after all just a number and you will only feel as old (or young) as you choose to feel!


I'm off to Mount Kili for the weekend, so hope y'all have a really pretty youthful weekend now!


TTFN

Amazing !! Don´t try this at home !!!

This was posted by Wilde Yearnings and I thought I'd put it up as well...

By the way, it's usually a lot worse than this! I love every minute in Africa!

Hope y'all have a pretty day now!

TTFN

Ps: WY thinks that 'Shitty hoppa' drivers are on crack - but if i had to sit in this traffic all day, I would also use A LOT of drugs!

My youth and Kenya now.

Had one of those 'reminisce' evenings last night - nay, I lie, could not sleep so the mind wandered a bit, and my thoughts took a stroll to my youth again. (Seeing as I'm such an old codger at the ripe old age of 38!)

Twenty odd years ago I was an Innocent-ish young man with very little experience of life. I grew up in a typical Afrikaans home where rules were rules and you obeyed them, end of story. My parents (bless them) were WAY more liberal and progressive than most. Yes, I grew up as a privileged little boy with parents that encouraged us to think and to 'debate' the situation in our lives, but we were also very 'guarded' as to the 'big bad world out there'! This is not a bad thing - my parents protected us as any parent would, and we somehow managed to survive despite our guarded upbringing. But to get back to twenty years ago when I left my parents home.

My first experience out in the real world, all on my own that is, was when we went on our 'Matric Holiday' with a few friends. Matric is what your last year of High School is called in SA - or Grade 12 as it is called now. Then you're supposed to go off to further education - but in my case it was a case of going to do my National Service - Conscription was still very active in those days. That is a story that I've told before - just follow the link, so not going to get into that again. What I do remember so well thought from this time in my life was my awakening sexuality.

Here I was in a time when it was still very much taboo to be anything but a total 'skirt chaser' and I was on holiday with my group of male friends - all of whom where 'obviously' as straight as they come. (No pun intended - well maybe just a little...) Eight boys travelling trough what was then known as the Eastern Transvaal (Now Mpumalanga), hiking nature trials, skinny dipping under waterfalls, sunbathing on the rocks afterwards. It was such an innocent time... (Ja right, I hear you saying...)

At this stage of my life I was sexually active already - his name was C and he and I had been at it for quite some time already, but we both thought this was just a 'phase' and that we would still get married (to women darlings - try and focus!), have children/breed and live the 'normal' life. We were unaware that gay people actually existed - had normal lives and that this feeling that we had for each other was actually that L word. Now, thinking back, we had no real frame of reference at all - TV had no gay characters, it was not something that was discussed by anybody, and it was a very closeted society we lived in. (Which makes the new South Africa all that more special!)

What I'm getting at is that young gay men and women of today probably have it a lot better than I did in my time - in a open minded society, that is. Kenya reminds me of my youth to an extent when we had to live our lives under covers and behind closed doors. My wish for this country is that people will come to realize that Gay people are not evil, vile terrible creatures that intend on stealing their husbands (well, unless they're cute - KIDDING!) and calling the fashion police on them. (Maybe in certain cases it could be justified.) Maybe one day all people can live their lives as they choose and not be victimised for being themselves.

Just a thought...

Hope y'all have a pretty day now,

TTFN

Graham Norton - Part 1

'I don't have much time' today, so gonna post a few videos of one of my favourite gay personalities...

Graham Norton Xmas Special - Part 2

One does enjoy Graham Norton quite a bit... And I also want one of those 'coffee stirers'.

Packing lists, moving dates, KRA and other 'madening' exercises...

'Pay Ceasar what is due to Ceasar' - says the bible, and in principle, I agree. After all, if nobody paid their taxes as they should, the goverment would not be able to do the job it is assigned. OK, there are certain things wrong with the way things are going after the 'general erection' of December here in Kenya - like the fact that a top heavy (never mind bloody expensive) pairlement is in place, but in principal, I have always believed that paying your dues to the goverment is part of the responsibilty of a good citizen/resident of a country. And I've been diligent in making sure that my 'contribution' (however meager it may be) goes to the state coffers every month.

Now, however, as I'm about to choose items to go into a container and have these memories shipped to another country, KRA (Kenya Revenue Authority - a.k.a Satan's spawn) is requiring me to complete a plethora of little forms and letters. Submit costs of items - how the hell should I remember. I don't keep receipts and most of the items were bought on the streets where receipts are not really a big priority anyway... But here comes the crunch!

If you think KRA is anal - try and deal with SARS (South African Revenue Services - a.k.a the devil incarnate). These people have the intilectual capacity of dead crayfish - no wait, that's an overstatement - of dead cacti, pond scum, nail varnish removal liquid, an ink blotch... Whatever really! For crying out loud - how the hell am I to 'repatriate' my meager earthly possesions without acutally following them into the country? (The first question is - Are you also entering the country with your goods?) I shake my head in utter disbelief. Wake up folks!

On a lighter note... Headin' here this weekend ->
Should be fun - just below Mount Kilimanjaro and time spent with a dear, dear friend of mine. At least then I can forget about the KRA's and SARS's of this world for a little bit...



Hope y'all have a really pretty day now!




TTFN

Dumb Laws - So Graham Norton

This is sooooo funni!

Poor Melba - was not in front of the que when brains were being dished out!

Have a nice weekend now!

Planning a move and other useless info...

As you might know, I'm being transferred back to SA from the beginning of July, so now we have to plan to take a few earthly possessions and obviously my clothing and personals down with me. It's not that I have anything specific of great value, but I do have quite a few things of great significance... It might mean nothing to somebody else, but to me these are memories that I need take with me, and place in our home in Pretoria lest I ever forget this phenomenal time of my life spent in paradise a.k.a Kenya.

So the process begins. Getting quotes from a number of relocation companies, deciding what is important and what I can actually just get rid of or (more likely) donate to some worthy charity. And this is where I'm surprising myself - yes, I actually gave a little yelp of utter surprise when I realized this. When I had to sit down and really decide what is important and not just a nice to have, it became apparent that I've changed in this time that I've spent in Kenya. You see, before pretty things were quite important to me - good brand names. Yes, I was a style queen... But now it seems with age comes wisdom (or stupidity, not quite sure which it is.). It is no longer the big and fancy or shiny item that must absolutely be crated up and packed on a container, but the small little items that have some sentimental value. The silly little wire boda-boda curio that I bought from a street vendor in Kampala, the framed carving acquired in Dar-es-Salaam once, the stack of kikoy's bought all over the country, the wind-chimes of little tin fish I found in Kisumu, the lopsided glass bowl my staff gave me for Christmas last year... Nothing of real value, but completely irreplaceable items nonetheless.

Nice... So, I have a whole house load of stuff that needs to be disposed of. Except for my books - that's getting packed first! Any ideas...

Hope y'all have a nice weekend now!

TTFN

Happy Gay day y'all!

Well, today is (unofficially!) Gay Day in South Africa. It comes (no pun intended) from the date - the 8Th of May. When said in Afrikaans it's pronounced 'Ag Mei' which is a silly connection, but a connection nonetheless...

So, go on - hug a straight person today. Or, if you feel like it, give their tight little tushie a little pinch!

Whatever blows your hair back!

TTFN

Travelling in Kenya.

Just read a 'rather funny' post, and it reminded me of a time (it was last Easter, actually) when we travelled down to Kilifi for a long weekend. A dear friend from SA - her nickname for me is Chicken so that's what we'll call her here, was here for a visit, and a local friend Es was also travelling with us. Dawie was flying in from Joburg and taking a connecting flight to Mombasa where we would meet him and then proceed on to Kilifi. The picture is of the house we rented.

But I digress...

Chicken is a 'Kugel' of note. This is 'Souf Efriken-ism' for 'Cool Girl', or a person (of the female persuasion usually, but you do get male kugels) that is a dedicated follower of fashion, talks with a funny-ish nasal, accent (Ye knew doll, this little spot is deviiiiiiine!Im about to platz!) and is ever so slightly over the top. Do not misunderstand me for one second - I love her to pieces, she is such a genuine person and will not hurt a fly, but her mannerisms really are very stereotypical. It is also important to note here that Chicken is VERY well travelled and has been all over the world - both on leisure and business travel. However, most of her travels are to Europe and the like...

So we set of for Mombasa with a cooler box full of Evian water, wet wipes to clean our hands and faces every now and again, some low -GI sandwiches in a cooler and a half a ton of luggage. We also have the air con pumping full blast in the car, and soft, esoteric music playing on the stereo. It's all very Zen...

As you might know, the first section between Nairobi and Machakos Crossing is not particularly smooth, and this took us a good hour and a bit to complete. Chicken is making little funny noises in between mouthfuls of Evian, and me overtaking into oncoming traffic and the occasional crazy driving antics as only displayed here in Kenya. Ducking a diving in between cars and matatus, taking on trucks and just generally being a right arse on the road - loving every minute of it... Chicken - being of the nervous passenger variety, makes comments like -'You never told me we needed a sports bra for this daaaahling', and 'My Gawd, this is stuuuuning doll!' and 'Mummy needs to make piddles, see!'... So, after a rather bouncy bit we stopped at Machakos Crossing at the fuel station to 'make piddles'.

This specific station is used by the truckers that travel on this very busy route and, to be honest, is not particularly 'clean and sanitized'. In fact, as you get out the car, you get a whiff of old urine and blocked toilets, and then you're not even close to the bathroom door yet. You have to still walk around the building... So, Es and Chicken head for the bathroom (I know better, I'll stop next to the road a little out of town) and I sit in the car. Chicken has a packet of wet wipes, a toilet roll and hand lotion in her hands in addition to the whole handbag thing, and Es - being an old Kenyan traveller, a roll of paper and wet wipes.

Chicken, bless her, walked to the bathroom with all her normal flair, flicking her hair, slight bounce in the step and bosom pushed out to as far as it would go - getting the attention they deserve - the puppies, I mean, her Prada heels clicking on the rough sidewalk next to the petrol station. She walked to the door of the bathroom, slight grin on her face and took one step into the door of the bathroom. As if running into a brick wall she stopped, paused for the slightest of moments and duly made a 180 degree turn. Walking back to the car, she looked me straight in the eye and said 'Don't worry sweetie, I'll hold it!'

And she did - until we stopped another two hours later - but she was applying Avroy Slain to her lips every few minutes and not a drop (wet or dry) passed her lips until she had a chance to empty her bladder. I have enormous respect for her - I cannot hold 'it' that long - when a mans gotta go, a mans gotta go!

The rest of our trip was wonderful and the rest of the weekend phenomenal, but that is another post altogether - or maybe I've written about it already... Not about to go back and check. There were other great instances - like when Chicken went to braid her hair in Kilifi, when she was 'attacked by a vicious minkey' in the room, when we had to remove the 'froggie from the bathroom but not kill it, because it has a family' or when we used a tuk-tuk to go to town and it nearly rolled over when negotiating one of the pot-holed streets. (That scream made the whole town of Kilifi stop in it's tracks for a few seconds...)

Dawie and I both LOVE Chicken to pieces and one of the places where we can always just be ourselves is at her stunning home in Sandton. (Obviously!) She is just such a sweet, wonderful and sincere friend. The rare kind!

Now hope y'all have a really purdy day now, see!

TTFN

Spot the difference...

This is a picture of where I'm living at the moment...

City of Nairobi.







































And this is where we live in Pretoria...











Can anybody spot the difference?

Thanks to Google Earth for the pictures provided.











Will tell you more about my wonderful weekend at Lake Baringo tomorrow, now there is just not enough time!

Hope y'all had a good weekend.

TTFN

Lake Baringo...

Spent some time this weekend at the stunning 'Camp Island' as we called it, or Island Camp as it is really known... Was a bit of Freudian Slip the first time it was said and it stuck around for the rest of the weekend. Well, long weekend really, we arrived on Thursday and only got back to the city on Sunday afternoon. It was truly worth every shilling... You have no choice but to relax and just let the time fly by - you're on an island in the middle of a croc invested lake, so what you gonna do - swim across?

The first pic is where we are crossing the equator by road...

I'll post a few pictures here today - no real time to write a whole story with it, but it will come!

On the boat on the way to the Island. It was a stunningly hot dry day!

Sunrise the next morning over the lake - taken from the veranda of my tent on the edge of the water. Boy, life is Africa is hell! Hell I tell you!

Sunset over the lake. Taken from 'skull island' as we referred to it. The island in your sight is where we stayed. Went for a sundowner cruise to another island...

Skull island taken from the restaurant side.

Just for interest sake, the owner of the lodge on the island is a lovely fellow that is quite the host - he's always got a quick joke and time to talk to his guests. He is also, very gay friendly for those gay folks looking for a spot to travel to that does not 'frown' upon two men sharing a double bed. (Not that my Dawie was there, but I discussed this with him...)

I'm out to my friends and they in turn outed me to him - not that I'm worried about that - he seemed very friendly. Even made a joke when we were checking out that he should post his lodge in the Pink Pages as 'Camp Island' and he (in a very serious note) told me about Gay tourism in other parts of the world, and how much we (the rainbow folks) could mean to a business - as if I don't know, but it was very sweet...

Some more pictures!

Am I the only one to see the 'phallic image' with this Eclair... Maybe I've just been away from the hubby for too long!

More sunset pic's.

Quite the unique picture taken by a friend. And a bit of a pun for the local brew, of which we consumed copious amounts. It was REALLY REALLY HOT, alright!

That all for now folks. Hope y'all have a really pretty day now!

TTFN

A few comments on comments...

Why is it that we feel so involved with other people's lives? Honestly, we read other blogs and make comments or leave advice to people who we've never met, and at best is most likely never will meet. Why is it that the 'blogosphere' has each one of us so totally spellbound that we feel we have to spend a not unsubstantial amount of our time every day on it? Is it because it's basically that whole little voyeur thing we all have in us? Or is it that we've 'met' people online that have become dear friends, or at least dear acquaintances that share our lives - the joy, the sorrow, the heartache, the happiness... I think it is the latter. Yes, it is sharing a life with other human beings on a totally intimate level without being 'really intimate' - if that makes any sense to anybody. (Having one of those days where my brain is over thinking everything to the n'th degree.)





Some old friends, some new ones and some that have fallen by the wayside as we went along this path. I don't keep a 'blogroll' (glad I spelled that correctly...) on my blog for many reasons, but it's not because I don't want to list these friends, it's mostly because it's not important to me - not important for others to see who I read and what 'blows' my hair back, so to speak. Hey, I'm a voyeur with a conscience after all! *silly smile on face*





When I started this blog it was mostly so I could keep in touch with my loved one/s in SA and so I could share some of my experiences. It has, however, morphed into something all of it's own with a personality and a life - not completely unpleasant but a little unexpected. I'm keeping a diary for the first time in my life, and it all nice and warm and fuzzy. (Oh crap, I'm about to puke! - How soppy can one human being be?) I'm all sentimental at the moment - maybe because there is a mayor change coming up in my life, maybe 'cause it seems I'm putting a very large (and important) part of my life behind me, maybe 'cause I'm just an old sentimental fool. Who knows Who cares really. My main thing now is to make the most of this last little bit of time I have here in Kenya. (Not that I won't be coming back for visits, but that is different...)





So, with that in mind - spending some time with friends at Lake Baringo this weekend (Thursday is a public holiday and I've taken Friday off), planning another trip to Lamu and to Zanzibar, and will make use of every minute to see the people that I want to spend time with. Will be having fabulous, long, extravagant dinners at home, and long expensive lunches at as many wonderful restaurants in the city as I can... Anybody wanna join me?





Hope y'all have a really fabulous day!!





TTFN

It is official...

Yes, it is official. I am relocating back to South Africa by the end of next month... And, to be honest, I'm completely confused. I wanted this - I wanted to be 'home' to look after the hubby and to make sure that he is his own self again. It is my duty, nay, my pleasure to be there for him in his time of need and I'm looking forward to being the man he deserves. After all, love flourishes not just during the good times, but also during the hard times So why am I so sad?

I've learnt to love this country... No, not just this country, but I've learnt to love the people here.

The friendly, totally phenomenal nature of the Kenyan nation makes me feel at home - always. And that is what makes this place so wonderful. In fact, someone said to me a while ago that I'm a Kikuyu of South African Decent - but I think that because I'm so utterly tight with money! Oh well, I saw it as a compliment... I will miss my members of staff that I've learnt to love dearly, I will miss the humour in the traffic in the mornings when the Matatus drive like absolute maniacs. I'll miss the chaos of the city, and the peace and quiet at my home. I will miss the fruit that still taste like fruit - not just 'shiny mudguards' on the outside and watery and tasteless on the inside. I will miss my friends and work mates. Sad? Yes, sad that I have to leave this place and move on to other things, but also glad that I've been able to spend a small portion of my life in this place, and with these people. Glad that I've had the chance to learn from them, and that I've been able to see that joy comes from within...

Ah well, so it is then. ('So is dat dan' - my Dutch uncle used to say!) Now to decide what I'll call my blog from the end of the month? Any suggestions?

Have a pretty day now y'all!

TTFN